IN:
journaling
overusing invisible ink in iMessage
songs with a random tempo switch up in the middle of the song (e.g., 3:03 mins into Kilby Girl by The Backseat Lovers or 1:22 mins into Strawberry Wine by Noah Kahan)
highlighting quotes in books that you love/that have an impact on you
ginger shots from Trader Joe’s (preferably to be taken first thing when you get to the office to remind your brain it’s time to get serious)
A quote from Deep Cuts by Holly Brickley that somehow managed to fully encapsulate how I feel about music. 
And because we’re playing by my rules, here’s another excellent quote from Deep Cuts by Holly Brickley. A “deep cut” is personal, even if someone else thinks it’s “not cool” or “too mainstream”. F those people.
OUT:
using ChatGPT like it is your closest friend/confidant (have you seen the MIT study that was just released??)
being mad if a baby is crying on a plane or generally in public near you
people who say that they “don’t read” (that’s not a flex, it’s embarrassing, open a book)
everything being a probiotic or a prebiotic (looking at you OLIPOP & Poppi)
my rare beauty highlighter breaking every single time it’s touched or tbh even looked at in the wrong way (I’m on my 3rd one in a year, I swear)
men who “test” women on their knowledge of sports and sports teams
BFFR:
Out: men who “test” women on their knowledge of sports and sports teams
I (a Yankee fan since I can remember, not that I have to prove myself to any of you) am walking up 6th Avenue in the West Village after a lovely night of laughs with some friends at the Comedy Cellar. Riding a high, off to another bar, it’s raining so I’m wearing my very cool two-toned Yankee hat (blue rim, cream top, super chic). Then, literally out of god knows where, an annoyingly loud man steps right in front of me and yells “NAME THREE YANKEES”… Hold on a quick second, let’s ruin this cute NYC moment I was having, I’m sorry, excuse me? One, how about you remove yourself from being near my face, gross. Two, have you also asked every single man who walks around this fning city in a Yankee hat the same question? BFFR.
“But ohhhh B he was just probably trying to flirt!” “He probably thought it was a great intro line, an ice-breaker or something.” Ew, if so, then ew because absolutely not. I have zero patience for that behavior. For those of you who know me well you won’t be shocked, but the sentence “oh, how about you actually go fuck yourself” came out of my mouth so quickly (sorry Mom and Dad) I didn’t even have a second to think about it (my friend Abby endearingly calls this me “running hot” or being “quick to anger”). I probably should’ve laughed it off, professed my love for Austin Wells, Max Fried, and Aaron Judge and called it a day. But god forbid my autopilot instincts let a man get away with being a misogynist!!
I can tell you exactly what happened in my brain in those .5 seconds…the calculation: Naming three players would mean he won and that I had to prove myself to him. Not naming three players would also mean he won because he could then assume I couldn’t name any. See how that sucks? See how women are caught in this forever stupid loop? So, instinct says to go with option three, curse him out instead!
“But B haven’t you heard that men are actually afraid to talk to women out in public now? They’re afraid they’ll get yelled at, rejected, or turned down in an embarrassing way, and what you did just proved that.” Um, again, I’m sorry but if “name three Yankees” is going to be the move you use to approach a woman on the street (who btw is a stranger) as a way into her life, by trying to diminish her… then there’s a severe lack of critical thinking skills there that should concern us all. It’s actually not that hard to approach a woman (and side note we also have a right to be on guard around men to be fair). Be respectful, be normal, and try to be funny if you can manage (hard for most of you though, I know).
But wait, let’s circle back to my earlier point, why don’t men ever ask other men these questions? I’ve never once heard a man ask another man to “name x amount of players on x team” or “who was the coach of the Giants in 2008? (and if you know his blood type, extra points)” or “do you actually like the Yankees or do you just think Jeter or Judge or [insert player] is hot” (I added in Jeter because I’ve been asked these dumb questions since childhood, it’s not a new phenomenon). Weird, right? Even weirder if you know I was raised watching Real Madrid with my Dad religiously (or really any soccer match from any league…except for MLS, we are not an MLS family, soz). Raised having the Yankees and/or Giants games on the TV at all times whenever possible. I mean really the Tennis Channel can’t catch a goddamn break at my parent’s house!! But again, I shouldn’t need to prove myself to any of you — men don’t! I can wear whatever sports merch I want, for the teams that I enjoy supporting, and not have to justify a thing…and yet that’s still what this is starting to feel like…
Whatever. Overall, to the men out there to whom this applies (I know, hashtag not all men, I hear you and I see you my kings), if you’re going to ask a sports-related question to a woman as a kind of “gotcha”, you might want to take a beat and re-think that. How about we make a deal, if you promise to stop doing that to us, I promise to also take a beat and not instantly yell profanities at you followed by telling you that you obviously hate women.
I actually think we can all grow from this!
Xx,
B
P.S. As an homage to Deep Cuts by Holly Brickley (but secretly really due to my serious emotional attachment to music) I’m adding a new little section to The B List with my deep cut of the week. It may likely be a song that is not technically considered a “deep cut” on that particular album, but for some reason or another has cut me deeply this week. I’m a lyrics girlie at heart what can I say!
Deep Cut: Free Now by Gracie Abrams
Inshallah
This list is just another reminder that I have yet to buy a highlighter. Def not getting rare beauty one I guess.