Week One

let's get this thing started

IN:

• crisp white bedsheets

• vintage furniture made in the 60s

• wearing sunglasses on the subway

• stone fruit season

• Elizabeth Arden Eight Hour Cream as lipgloss

• deleting your texts once a conversation is over

look at me, mysterious and migraine-less on the L train

OUT:

• celebrities who gatekeep their plastic surgeries

• corporate greed (on-going, not week specific)

• restaurants that don’t have real Diet Coke (or Coke Zero)

• everyone telling me to eat more protein

• men in my early morning reformer pilates classes

• “co-parenting” a pet with an ex

Are men in New York ok? Keep your head up, king, get out of that funk.

BFFR:

In: deleting your texts once a conversation is over

I do not understand why everyone has such a big problem with me doing this. Relax. “Don’t you want to read your texts back and have those memories to look back on??” Grow up. Be an adult and screenshot funny messages to save to your Google photos and never look at again like the rest of us. It’s not “shady” or “weird” that I do this (I wish I had something interesting to hide) — it’s purely organizational. Every text in my phone is either an on-going conversation or something where an action item remains. I don’t need to look back to texts from 2017 where we’re scheduling a study group session for our Con Law final. I’m ok letting that one go. And you should be too. And please, I beg, stop re-reading the texts from your favorite situationship, it’s a waste of time and energy. Delete the texts!!

Xx,

B